The online student news source of Lovejoy High School

The Red Ledger

The online student news source of Lovejoy High School

The Red Ledger

The online student news source of Lovejoy High School

The Red Ledger

Tips to waste class time

Everyone has that class. The class that doesn’t have any of your friends, the class where the work and the lectures put you to sleep, the class where you’d give anything just to miss a couple of minutes. As a senior, I’ve had my fair share of subjects and teachers that I dread and I’ve learned a couple of techniques that get me through those 45 minutes of agony.

With that being said, here are some tips on wasting time in class.

·      Get up and blow your nose. Multiple times. At least you’re up and moving, right?
·      Ask to go to the bathroom. This is a guaranteed waste of at least 5 minutes, but be sure to time it well; enough to squander a healthy amount of class time, but not enough to make people think you’ve got digestive issues.
·      On the way to the bathroom, bend down and tie your shoe.
·      On the way back from the bathroom, bend down and tie your other shoe. Don’t forget, double knots take twice as long.
·      Asking questions and feigning interest in the subject might, depending on the teacher, keep your class talking. The better and more thought provoking the question, the more discussion, and the more time you have to completely zone out.
·      In the case of Socratic forums, get in the discussion and say a good point as quickly as possible. As soon as you have that 100% participation grade, you have a good 40 minutes for naptime.
·      Being able to disguise phone use in your lap, behind your bag, or underneath the desk is an incredibly useful skill. Take advantage of this at every opportunity.
·      If done correctly, sleeping in class can be completely hidden. It’s all in the body language. Practice in front of a mirror if necessary; the more convincing you are, the more successful you’ll be when the lights go down after lunch for your teacher to monotone his/her hundredth Power Point lecture.
·      If you’re really desperate, stage a coughing fit and ask to get a drink. If you’ve already been to the bathroom this period, make this episode as dramatic as possible. The teacher can’t deny a student that’s virtually dying of whatever illness you’ve just invented for yourself.

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