The curve, unbeknownst to adults in America, is extremely prevalent in the lives of today’s American teens.

The curve, in short, is when two people are in a stage of “talking.” Both parties understand that there is mutual attraction. The curve is performed when one person pulls away from the other before dating ever occurs, thus curving their feelings away from the relationship. The curve has always been around as some other form (previously, the friendzone), but has evolved into its own with today’s generation.

The curve can be performed in many different ways, including straight up disappearing and ignoring the other person. I, however, am a Jedi Master of the craft and have a few alternative methods to performing the curve.

The sibling card

This one is one of my favorites. After building a close and somewhat intimate relationship with someone whom you have decided you no longer want to be with, wait til you are cuddling or involved in some other form of person-to-person comforting to pull this one out. After about 15 minutes, look the person in the eyes and say to them “you are like a brother/sister to me.”

Exposing your identity as an animal

As you build a relationship with the person you’re curving, slowly start revealing the traits of your animal nature. Maybe let out a casual “meow” or a “soft bark” (especially if you see a mailman). Doing this will slowly build up suspicion in the other person. Then after you have established your animal persona, show up in an animal costume and claim that you are an animal, and deny any evidence that you are a human.

Language switch

This one is one that comes swiftly, after you decide that you no longer want to be “thinging” or “talking” to your significant other. Suddenly start replying to everything they say in another language. They may just think it is a joke at first, but if you keep it up for a while, and forget your native tongue, they will get the hint. For bonus points, start adopting the clothing and culture of your language of choice. Start carrying maracas. Everywhere.

The curve is a versatile tool and whichever way you choose to perform it, may the Force be with you, young padawan.