Editor’s note: This is the fifth in a series of farewells from some of the seniors on The Red Ledger staff.

“So, are you getting excited for college?”

That’s the question that I dread answering every time one of my parents’ friends comes over or I have a conversation with a past teacher.

The answer should be simple. I should be able to quickly respond with “Yes! I can’t wait to start my new life,” or “Yes! Get me out of this little country town,” but I can’t find myself being genuine in those responses.

Of course I will have a great freshman year of college. I am enrolled at my dream school where I will take courses over the subject I believe to be my passion. I don’t have to be at school for eight hours a day Monday through Friday, and I can really start seeing myself as an adult.

These are all perks of college that I know I’ll be thankful for in August and will keep me from running back to 2350 Estates Parkway. Until then I feel the need to refrain from wishing I’m somewhere else.

I can’t waste the time I have left of my childhood.

The time I have to cry with my mom.

The drives to and from school with my sister every day.

The sleepy cuddles with my dog. The political and spiritual conversations I have with my dad. Dabbing with my brother. All of these are things that I feel like I never cherished enough considering their worth.

I’m scared to leave behind the comfort of familiarity and exchange it for an entirely foreign environment. I love going to high school football games on Friday with my friends and attending pep rallies and seeing the same faces every year. I have to find a balance between loving high school but being content with its end.

These next few weeks will be difficult. Coming to the realization that something I have been working four years for has finally arrived. That I am about to be honored because of those years, signalling the finality of their end. There will never be another chance to get my first car of have my first boyfriend or take my first AP exam. It’s all behind me, and now I am set with the task of how to manage the new firsts: how to get along with a roommate and how to manage my cafeteria credit and how to pass a college course.

This column is mainly for my senior self, for my own catharsis, but it’s also for my future self, for the transitional periods of my life. A reminder that the best is yet to come if you can take the past as a learning experience over the peak of life’s greatness.

Because of the strong ties I hold with high school career, I would like to say thanks to the following: the Lord for his guiding hand, my parents for their support, my siblings for their laughs, my friends for our fun memories, and my teachers for their dedication. To them I wish that my love and gratefulness will never leave them, even when it’s sent from Aggieland. Thanks and Gig’em.