Interview with coaches Harper Pool, Quinn McDermott and Leighton Archer

TRL: You guys completely ran last year’s junior class out of the building in last year’s matchup. However, skeptics argue that was a testament to how bad last year’s junior class was. What is your response to the doubters?

Harper Pool: I think it’s a lot of both. I think they’re a really bad team. We’re just a really good team. We are a far more superior team than them.

Quinn McDermott: They have no athletes. Their coaches are really bad at play calling. On the other hand, we are elite coaches.

Leighton Archer: We have a cannon at our quarterback position in Leah Taylor.

 

TRL: Your team is the undoubted favorite in the first round against the sophomores. How do you prevent this hype from leading to a choke?

HP: We don’t choke, I don’t think that word is even in our vocabulary. We always go by the motto “Ego Wins,” so obviously, we’re going in confident, knowing we’re the best. It’s hard to choke when you know you’re the best.

QM: All the other teams are having practices because they’re scared of playing us.

 

TRL: The sophomores you will face failed to score a touchdown last year, did your staff even bother wasting the time to prepare for their offense?

HP: I thought those senior coaches were bad, but boy, those sophomore coaches are something else. I was talking to [my brother] Bumper, and he said don’t worry about them at all.

QM: Especially Ralph Rucker, he is awful.

LA: Ralph Rucker is best known as “Fluff Bus”

 

TRL: At what point would you consider resting your starters for the championship in the likely case in which you guys rout the sophomores?

HP: We want to beat them into the ground. I don’t care if we score hundreds of points, we’re not going to rest them.

QM: If someone tears an ACL, we’ll get a brace on her and get her back out there. We have depth, too. Our backups would easily be the best players on any of the other teams.

LA: It’s next man up. We have a team full of superstars.

 

TRL: Every year, tensions always seem to rise due to some questionable officiating that always seems to favor the seniors. Are you expecting a fair playing field, particularly in a potential championship against the seniors?

HP: Coach Keifer is not officiating anymore, and I talked to him about this yesterday, and he was really the one who had it out for us, but he retired, which is good.

QM: Coach Keifer just couldn’t take the heat from us on the sideline.

LA: If a call goes against us, we will have a tantrum. [Unsportsmanlike] penalties don’t matter to us.