Dating a senior may seem cool when you are a freshman, sophomore, or junior. But come graduation time, it may not feel so cool when you’re left alone.
Long-distance relationships are a pressing issue that many high school students have to face. Many students have boyfriends or girlfriends in a grade above or below them, and because of the transitory nature of high school, one of them has to leave for college before the other. Some of the kids who leave don’t go very far, but some head to faraway places to pursue their education, leaving their significant other with a hard choice. Follow them to college in order to stay together or go where they really want to go?
Some intelligent students choose to go their own way. These students have had their eye on a certain college since a young age, think they can maintain a long-distance relationship, or won’t let a high school relationship get in the way of the rest of their life.
Smart idea. High school is one thing, but college is a whole different ballgame. You are leaving home, taking academic responsibility into your own hands, and starting a new life. Maybe it’s better to wipe the slate clean and leave yourself open to everything that comes your way instead of being tied down to someone far away who may not hold your relationship to the same standard as you do. A little freedom isn’t a bad thing.
A number of couples simply decide to break up before eventual separation and heartbreak. Another smart idea. This can be hard on some kids though, especially if they have been in the same relationship for multiple years or are too emotionally invested in a teenage relationship. They can’t get over their “loss” and they spend their time at college pining for their lost loved ones and can’t focus on creating new relationships at their new home.
On the other hand, some students deal better with the breakup. It can open up opportunities for the newly single students to meet new people and make new friends they would not otherwise have a chance to meet, since they are not spending time visiting or talking to their other half.
Besides, it’s high school. We’re a bunch of kids who are still growing up. We may think we really love whoever we’re with, but chances are we don’t even know what that really means yet. At this point in our lives it’s probably the easiest to leave someone, because we’ll be leaving everything we know in four years or less.
Of course, the smart thing to do isn’t always what we want to do.
Some students follow their boyfriend/girlfriend to either the same college or a college near the school the older one has gone to. Sometimes the students both want to go to the same college because it has programs that interest each of them. More often, though, it’s a blind leap, and the younger student commits to the older one’s school regardless of whether that school suits their needs, is in a desirable location, or has the majors he/she is interested in.
Now, I don’t want to say these blind leapers are stupid, but I honestly can’t understand how someone could follow their boyfriend or girlfriend to the same college regardless of whether it’s right for them. I get why you would want to maintain a relationship with someone you really like, but if you go to a college that’s not going to give you the best education for what you want, that’s literally thousands of dollars wasted.
For other students, though, it’s a more involved choice. While they want to be near their boyfriend or girlfriend, they also want to get a good education, and one that’s well suited to their personal needs. These students research both the older student’s school and schools in the same area that fit their criteria to find the best fit. Even though the kids may not be at the same school, they will be relatively close to one another and can make a relationship work while both getting the education they want.
I think this is probably the best option if you want to stay with your boyfriend or girlfriend, since you’ll be close enough to see each other occasionally but still far enough away from each other to have your own lives at school.
As for me, I can’t tell you what path is better and what I’ll end up doing, because everyone’s situation is different, and the mind and the heart don’t always agree. I don’t harbor any illusions about changing people’s minds and if you’re in a relationship, you have to decide for yourself what you want to do, and think about it very carefully. Choosing a school that is right for your specific needs and wants is incredibly important. It may not seem like it now, but where you go to college can shape the rest of your life.
